I was thinking about something LA said this morning in her blog. It led me to contemplate the proverbial fork in the road.
We’ve all been there, haven’t we. We’ve arrived at a point in our life’s journey where we must decide which way to take. We’re standing at a fork in a road that forces us to choose which way to go. Without knowing what lies at the end of either choice.
We can either go left, or we can go right.
Sometimes, the condition of the roads might give us clues as to what lies ahead. If one road shows to be a clear path leading into sunshine, and the other a bumpy road full of pot holes and boulders, covered in dark cloud, which road would you choose?
Does the state of the road give you insights as to what lies at the end of it?
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. About choices, about decisions, about what-ifs.
Up until perhaps six months ago it was a no brainer that I would choose the comfortable road that looks easy to travel on. The one that doesn’t suggest surprises, unpleasant or otherwise. I liked my comfort zone, and the implied easy road to get somewhere.
I wasn’t equipped, emotionally or mentally, to purposely pick the harder journey.
I was tired. Raising young kids in a house I don’t like while struggling with this ongoing hearing issue has done a number on me. It chipped away at my identity. Now, the teen years are upon us and it’s a whole slew of new challenges.
I’m still tired, but in a different way. And despite the fatigue, which is more mental than physical, I have found some time to rediscover who I am. Or, more correctly, who I have become.
All this has happened within the past half year or so.
Partly, this blog’s community is reason for this. You, the ones who take the time to comment and like things I write, you have opened my eyes, and my perspectives, in ways I never thought possible. I ❤ you for this.
A newly developed friendship has also impacted the way I look at life these days. My outlook has changed, and my willingness to break down some of my proverbial walls has increased, as well. I’m more self-assured, more confident, more open about things today than I was before. This new friendship has boosted my self-confidence, as well as my writing abilities, in ways that are hard to explain. I cherish this more than I can put into words. (The irony is not lost on me here. Ha.)
Perhaps I’m more selfish as a result. Not at the expense of anyone, but rather as a way to finally allow myself to be *me* in all the ways I wasn’t before.
I no longer allow other people’s discomfort to inhibit my creativity. It must be true, because I placed this statement at the top of my blog. 🙂
I’ll tell you something. If you feel inhibited about a certain aspect in your life, I encourage you to write about it. Write it someplace where no one will see it. I do this in Evernote. I take a topic I’m shy or concerned about and I just empty my thoughts into the keyboard.
This is really hard to do initially because you will find yourself stumbling over words that give you discomfort. Let’s say you have a body image issue. Writing about that is difficult because certain words that describe parts of your body you don’t like will create an emotion in you that you will want to avoid. So you may type out the word, then delete it because it’s too uncomfortable to see it there on the page.
Write it anyway. Type it out. Go to a thesaurus and look at synonyms of that word.
It is really quite liberating. Just keep reminding yourself that no one will see it. It’s for your eyes only. (Unless you want to share. But that is up to you, and only you.)
Sometimes, I take it a step further. I might take my uncomfortable situation and create a fictitious story around it. Why not? It’s fun and educational and all kinds of interesting things start to happen inside your head…
I have many stories like this stored away in my Evernote app. 🙂
What I’m getting at is that as we journey though life, we often choose the comfortable, easy way toward some goal. And this is fine. We’re all tired from the demands that are dished out to us on a daily basis. Family life is not for whimps.
Yet…wouldn’t it be nice to choose a less traveled option one day, just to see what it will bring? Navigate a different path for once? Take a brick or two out of the wall that surrounds and protects you simply to add a new experience into your life?
If we don’t do this now, then when?
I do this with my words.
How do you do it? And if you haven’t started, do you think you might want to at least consider?